43 years and gone

2004-02-13 - 9:41 a.m.

Christie: Girl, I'm so glad we dragged you away from that quart of rocky road and got your skinny little butt out in the world.

Barbie makes a vaguely unintelligible grunting sound that approximates agreement.

Teresa: (tossing down her 4th Sex on the Beach shooter) Yeah, I just can't stand the thought of you moping around that dreamhouse anymore, mooning over that anatomically vague loser.

Barbie: (softly into her rum and coke) It wasn't all that bad really. Though it did take some acrobatics to...

Teresa: (interrupting with her voice and her hand shooting out into a stop sign) Woah! Way more information than we wanted on that jerk, honey. Here, have another shot of tequila...it'll make you forget all about him.

Barbie does the shot and then mangles the wedge of lime in her hands.

Barbie: Yeah, forget him. 43 freaking years and no ring. WTF? What kind of girl does he think I am? (winces as she takes a long slug from her rum and coke) Well, I've just got to say I'm keeping the Beetle and even that purple 'vette we got back in the 70s.

Christie: So what brought all this on?

Barbie: Well, it was clearly going nowhere. And a girl needs some stability in her life. I mean God knows I've never been able to keep a career for long. My friends have come and gone over the years (hey, no offense, girls...I LOVE you guys!), Skipper's grown up...Kelly's not far behind...

Teresa: Girl, we've got to get you back out on the market. Look at that hottie over there with the boogie board. (motions with her cosmopolitan glass to a buff young man across the room who's inexplicably got his boogie board in the bar)

Christie: Hoooo yeah! You need yourself some fresh meat! Get out there girl!!! Oh, Blaine!!!!

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